Insomnia never sleeps, so why should we?

Why do the thoughts of earlier days that made you angry, upset, and sad come to you when you're about to lay down, close your eyes, relax your body and rest your mind.

Is it because we have a room all to ourselves covered from wall to wall in darkness?
Or is our subconscious trying to tell us something? Converse with us in some way.

"If we believe that we're all alone in this world, know that we're together in that too, nobody who is alone is alone. There are many people feeling the same stranded-ness that you're feeling right now."
It's just a matter of how you see it, your perspective.

Do you have the similar problem? I mean, having those thoughts come back to you while you lay down your sword and shield for the day.

"I'm leaving for a destination that I still don't know..."

I used to come here to get things off my chest. To come back in the future and remember how I felt when I wrote this...

Now I feel as if I can't do that here. I'm trying, I am, I'm trying to get back into it.
Trying to find the writer in me that's currently in a writer's "union" just boycotting any work.

Don't know why but it feels like something is stopping me. Never had this before. Hoping it goes away...

Have you noticed that I've been using the word "feel" very often...haha weird.

"...help me make the most of freedom and of pleasure, nothing ever lasts forever. Everybody wants to rule the world."

Recently I've been thinking about my past.
Why?
It should be behind me already, I've already put it behind me.
I've cut myself off from the past just so it can only be a memory.
And that's all it's supposed to be...
(trying to get back to writing, thought this could be a start, because it was too long for a post on facebook and twitter lol)

Editor's Note:
Little experiment is on its way, I'm pretty excited.
A blog almost everyday of how love still exists in mankind.
How it affects me everyday, how my special someone affects me everyday.
Stay tuned.

If you were seeking people to work for your company...

...would you hire let's say Person A, who does what the position requires amazingly, let's say a hair stylist; the person who is applying for the job styles hair and creates great work of art naturally.
They were born to do what they are applying for.
-plus this gives your company much more customer intake and much more money.
But has no job experience or degrees in that field.

or

would you hire Person B, who has had many jobs, has a degree in "hair styling" but they are bad at what they trained to do. What they studied isn't for them, they should of reconsidered or even thought twice of getting training in that field. They flat out suck.
-and if you do hire this person it will lower the number of customers and of course what we all need...money.
But you only hired Person B because of his long (with many jobs and so much education) resume.

Of course, naturally, you'd hire Person A...

if only the job market would view employees this way...

I never knew having something stolen could ever feel this good...

Happiest I've ever been.

He's my one in a million.

I first talked to him around mid June…and you wouldn't believe it where… on Twitter.

And as luck would have it, he read one of my blogs, that commented on a guy I was lusting over. To keep the guys name in secret I used the first letter of his name, "E". As a little joke for myself, I mentioned the guy as "Mr. E" (mystery). lol

Which just happened to be my now boyfriend's username on Twitter! He thought I was talking about him, I explained, and exchanged numbers. Ha ha

But I paused what was going between myself and him, due to some issues that occurred during mid-late ’09. It took 6 months to regain communication with him. He asked me to be his date for New Years Eve. I hesitated, what went through my mind was: relationships that begin from meeting online are a complete failure and never "hit it off". After all, I said yes. Something my parents weren't so ok with.

As the day became night on the 31st of December my legs became shaky, my appetite was lost, and my stomach was filled up to the top with those cute white with pink butterflies. Then, the door bell rang.(Falling in love wasn't my plan but who am I to fight it) I walked out of my house, saw him for the first time and asked myself one question, "is this real?" He took my breath away, in a good way, though. I couldn't believe the night, it felt unreal. Midnight struck and so did our first kiss. Now I knew it was all but a dream. Incredible, if I might add.

As each day passes, we realize how a simple "yes" changed both of our lives in so many beautiful ways that we can only imagine. We both thought none of this love would ever come knocking at our door, but if I remember it quite well, he actually rang the door bell and didn't knock. :)

I was recently asked, "is he what you imagined a boyfriend to be?" I replied, "No. He's even better than I imagined." A smile followed.

They say things always happen for a reason, nothing comes into your life without a purpose. I've always understood and believed this saying, but now I know for a fact that "The Man up in The Heavens" puts you through courses or paths in life that have a meaning.

"Let's take the necessary steps to be each other's God's Best" -Unknown

"I love you today more than yesterday and tomorrow more than today." -Eric =)

He stole my heart.

Incapable.

In a desperate search to find that writer and photographer that I once had in me.
Writer's block for 3 months.
Nothing comes to mind.
Lost the sense of creativeness that ignited my fingers to type from words to sentences that turned into paragraphs and those paragraphs became a short story of the day.

Trying to regain it...for the past 3 months now.
Thought of a story not too long ago, about the mass drug related murders going on "next door".
But misdirected that story with too much thought...it broke what was supposed to come naturally.

"Through the worry, worry, worry,
caught in an endless maze,
when the lights go out,
all I can think about
is how we've seen...
better days."
-A. Lee

New Book.

It's been hard to not post any material from my book that I'm working on to blogspot. But if I post things up then what's the point of buying the book, right?
Here are a few themes/chapters in the book...and I still can't figure out a title for it.

• It's a unisex book
• Falling back into your old footsteps
• the difference from a heartbreak and a breakup
• men and women, same hardships but different situations
• maturity
• what life should really be
• the lines that should or can be crossed and the ones that can't
• the best advice is from deep within you(your gut instinct)
• acknowledge what's around you